Here are some tips for taking a pause in your life and making the most of it! In 2020, this is especially the main focus.
As I write this post, I am right in the middle of a lockdown… Sometimes it can feel like a forced prison and then there are moments when reflection work becomes so powerful… Like an unexpected liberation. 2020 is an opportunity for a great pause and reset.
This is NOT a year to start anything new. With all the retrograde energy and the global pause, this year is going to offer us a transitional/transformational space to observe where and who we are – and what changes and directions we want to focus on in the near future. A grand re-structuring is taking place so it might be a slow and steady year.
I invite you to make this your own spiritual practice. A simple way of doing this is through journal writing – and I offer plenty of reflection questions that you can use regularly to reflect on.
✨ It’s OK to grieve the year we have lost…
What happened to all the plans we made? All the events that have been cancelled? The trips we had in mind? The special occasions we wanted to celebrate? The job we have/had?… I am sure each person can name at least 1 thing that had to change this year, with no warning.
This is not a year for Spiritual bypassing. I was inspired by this article and it made me think about how often the whole concept of living “a spiritual or conscious life” is still full of spiritual bypassing. This year, we are now being offered the golden opportunity to allow our Self to dive deeper into our Self, which includes the full-on Shadow side. Skipping over issues with false positivity and distraction is not going to help us evolve. And I know many of us have already had a taste of some of these elements during the quarantine/lockdown period. The world paused and finally had time to reflect and see what is going on – on a personal and collective level.
In the process, we may need to grieve deeply. Things will never return back to the way it once was… Too much has been going on. And the year that we thought was going to unfold has probably gone too… Whatever comes up, it’s Ok to feel it. It’s OK to dive into it. It’s OK to allow our Self to feel all the spectrums of our emotions/energy-in-motion.
As empaths and highly sensitive people, we are processing much more. It’s also good to identify which emotions are sourced as ours/our internal Self OR theirs/external source. If we live with others, we will also probably be picking up from them as they go through their own processes. As you dive deeper into what is coming up, be aware that what you are grieving can also be energy links to so much more than your own experience.
🌿 Reflection Qs:
- What plans did you have this year that you can no longer do?
- Right NOW, how am I honestly feeling and why?
- In my life NOW, what is draining or in spiring my energy? And how can I change it if needed?
- What old parts of my Self are being shed?
✨ Radical Self Care…
I think many empaths and highly sensitive people often forget to put their own Self first. This may especially be true for Self-care routines. 9 out of 10 of the empath clients I meet are usually the ones who offer the grounding force for others… working as natural channelers of energy. This year offers us a time to re-evaluate how we re-charge our own energy. After all, if we don’t have our own full battery, how can we give/channel to everything around us? (Work, family, friends etc). It is not a selfish act… We can’t really operate fully from an empty battery.
Owning our right to live a happy life. Making Self-care a daily practice is key to this! When I mention this to my clients – or remind my Self to practice this – I am often confronted by the idea that Self-care has to be something removed from our daily routines… Then comes the initial resistance, with the thoughts like: “I don’t have time for that” and/or “I can’t afford to leave my daily life for quiet time away”. What we forget (I include my Self in this sometimes!) is that Self-care should be part of our usual daily life – It doesn’t have to cost anything more or take any more of our time. For example: Enjoying deep breathing as we commute to work, slowing down when we are eating a meal, putting on our favourite music playlist in our headphones as we walk to the grocery store… Small acts of Self-love in each moment. This is what really counts! – And if we can also afford to add a full-on hour each day for our Self or book a fabulous yoga retreat across the world, then this is just a beautiful bonus!
The global pause energy has given us room to look at our daily routines. Through our daily routines, we can build our life in the direction we love. Starting from the smallest and simplest daily practices.
🌿 Reflection Qs:
- Let me build an empath toolbox… What small Self-care things can I do during my day right NOW?
- What does Self-care mean to me?
- In my life, what do I enjoy doing?
- How can I add more things in my life to nourish my Self?
✨ Re-Evaluate what is important in our life…
With more Self-care, there is time to re-evaluate what really matters. One of the biggest lessons this year is: “WHAT REALLY MATTERS TO ME?”
A shake-up in the global pause was probably what it took for many of us to ask our Self this. Even after the pause, we have to move forward with a much more steady foundation… But to do this, we have to start by knowing what really matters to us and what we want to expand on or release. This is where clarity is important.
Change is part of the process. It might not necessarily be an obvious change on the outside… It will most likely be the inner shuffles of wet concrete slowly setting in place. The foundation of any building usually takes the longest to build. We are right here, creating a solid foundational level.
Call on your intuition! Empaths and highly sensitive people usually have a huge inner dialogue going on – A part of it will be our intuition calling on us to do/act in a different direction, with no logical sense attached. Our intuition will help us evaluate everything from a place that feels good for our Self. But do we hold space for our Self to talk to it? Or maybe we get confused by the other voices that we collect along the day?
A simple intuition tip: Talk to your intuition every day now. You could even give him/her a name – allow their character to form! Ask them questions (start with simple ones: “Which drink do I feel like having now? Which direction should I walk in this park? etc) – And observe what comes up (feelings, thoughts etc)… Maybe the answer won’t come up straight away, it might come out of the blue later – like in a dream or ah-HA moment! Let them speak to you… it will start to become louder and clearer with time. Your true intuitive voice will start to become more obvious in comparison to the other thoughts that stem from our doubts, fears, ego etc talking to you. This is a practice, a 3rd eye/6th Chakra awakening – The good thing is empaths and highly sensitive people naturally have this as their strength!
🌿 Reflection Qs:
- This year, what have I lost/gained that I feel grateful for?
- What lesson am I learning right NOW that shows me what I value and what I am worth?
- Who supports me on my journey? And in what way?
- What is my intuition calling me to explore?
✨ Conscious flexibility through retrogrades…
This is a year of REtrograde energy. Retrogrades offer us a chance to RE-do, RE-think, RE-evaluate, REmember, RE-develop, RE-define… think of all the words starting with R-E. Essentially, taking a huge step back and working behind the scenes, before the grand launch. Many of us are familiar with the several Mercury Retrogrades we have every year, but there are others we can also connect with!
Astrology looks at the general cycles we can tap into. I like to offer different tools to be able to tap into what nature’s cycles are showing us. And again, as empaths/HSPs, we are very good at, subconsciously or consciously, tapping into the wider picture of what is going on.
Conscious flexibility is needed in order to navigate these hidden waters. Retrogrades can often bring back old things and surprise us. As I am not an astrologer, I can share good links with information on each retrograde. If you are new to astrology, it may sound like a new language when you read them… See what the general theme feels like for you.
Pluto Retrograde – April to October:
Death and rebirth energy. Pluto tears things down in order for us to rise again, newly transformed. Think about the energy of the Goddess Kali – The energy is intense, fierce and liberating. It helps us to release the things we need to, often in a hard love manner.
>>> Read About It!
Venus Retrograde – May to June:
Venus is the pleasure of life, the receptive feminine. Think of all the beautiful things we love and provide comfort… Beauty, love, good food etc. This energy is also about the material things we need for our journey, like money. On a deeper level, we come to overstand what we truly value in our Self and how we can extend this sense of worth to the world around us. The receptive feminine energy allows us to attract what we need.
Saturn Retrograde – May to September:
Saturn is often referred to as a karmic teacher. Much like the strict father figure or school teacher who asks you to keep going with your homework, to do your best and to work on longterm goals. It is an energy of structure and order. With retrograde, it could help us restructure our lives in a new way… The good thing is that with all the hard and consistent effort, Saturn always delivers what you deserve. If you have been disciplined with your efforts, you will gain rewards!
>>> Read About It!
Neptune Retrograde – June to November:
The dance of illusions and our spiritual world. I feel like many empaths and highly sensitive people have a lot of connection in their own natal chart with this energy. It is a deeply empathic spiritual energy – yet on the challenging side, it can be a playground of illusions where we ask our Self what is real and what isn’t.
>>> Read About It!
Mars Retrograde – September to November:
Mars is often described as the warrior, the radical masculine. Think of a soldier at war, it can be ruthless energy of action at all costs. Mars likes to get things done, with full force. This energy will help us channel our actions in the places we need if we connect to it in a conscious way.
>>> Read About It!
✨ Observing what our external world is reflecting back to us…
As we shift within, our world around us will also reflect back to us what is going on. A mirror that gives us insights and challenges as to what we truly want to go ahead with. This seems to be the usual patterns that I observe in transitions with clients and my own life. This is especially true for a few obvious things…
The people closest to us might be the biggest challenge. When we start to change, the people closest to us react quicker, either consciously or unconsciously. They will notice the change in some way and sometimes, this is where things can get interesting – As we shift, the people closest are forced to also shift – even if it is just in the way they connect with you. Sometimes, it is super supportive – and sometimes, we get surprised that others show us our own inner resistances and fears. This is a normal part of the process. Time is usually a wonderful healer.
The Universe/You-In-Verse might bring back a lot of the old temptations again to test you. I will give you some simple examples from my clients… Example 1: A student decides that she wants to stop going out every night so she can now focus on her final year – Along comes her friends every night excited that a new club is opening and they are invited to the opening party. Example 2: A man is starting to date again, after many years of getting over his ex – As he starts to go out on dates, he starts to observe that he is attracting old things from his ex that he no longer wanted in a partner. Last example: A woman decides she wants to quit her job and travel for a year – During the week that she is making her plans, her boss comes into her office and says she is up for a promotion. Universe/You-In-Verse has a strange sense of humour! But the good side is that your vibrational shift has caused a forward reaction – and it is one that will challenge you to see if you *really* want the change or not.
New people and new situations that enter your life now might give you a clue. The most common way of knowing that it is new is because it will feel like something out of your comfort zone. As we change, we need to slowly be comfortable with releasing our old comfort zone and allowing new people/things/situations in our life. This can take time and the fear of the unknown, especially when we get a taste of what we once were dreaming of, can be overwhelming in many ways! Take a step back, observe, notice how these shifts are reflecting different sides of your Self.
🌿 Reflection Qs:
- At this moment, what is my external situation reflecting back to me?
- Can I see the same old patterns before – in people, situations, energy etc?
- As I change, what feels new to me now – in people, connections, energy etc?
- What are my biggest blocks that are forcing me to change the way I react to old habits and patterns?